How to spend your free time, a learners course.

Today I decided to make a Boston "Scream" Pie. I hate the name, but I acknowledge the fact they were trying to use cleaver word play in loo of the upcoming, Halloween. It was also in fact a cake, not a pie.

I choose to make this for a number of reasons...

1) My mother is coming in town and she makes me treats when I come back to the nest, I can only return the favor.
2) Make my mother see how much I really need a cake plate to properly display my creation.
3) Baking relaxes me, and I feel as if I accomplished something in the end. It is instant gratification, the only kind there should be.
4) I got a incredible idea of writing/ draw something in white chocolate in the frosting. I looked all day for a flat glazed cake recipe and this is the one I stumbled upon.

My new oven creates a bit of a challenge. It doesn't cook evenly, and by even I mean, the sides of your food will be burned yet the middle isn't even warmed yet. It also cooks about 75 degrees hotter than set too. if it says it should be done in 15 to 20 minutes, it is on fire in 7. i set the smoke-alarm off nearly every other day.

Clearly, for such an ambitious dessert, I could not dilly dally with a bipolar oven on the fritz. I went to the Yuma house and took all my supplies there to finish the job. Valorie, a resident of the Yuma house, and long time Picasso, offered to help me in my efforts to come up with something really great to doodle onto my cake. "Lets put your face on it."-Valorie Boss. She was absolutely right, nothing says "Welcome to my new adult lifestyle mum," than a cake with your own image in the frosting.

So that's what we did. Val sketched me out, and put it into frosting. It was perfect. I had never been so happy, and so grateful for her gift of the arts. Truly she is the master of mediums.

End Result:



Every time I open the frig I chuckle. I really do need a cakplate. this shouldn't be hidden from the world.

Things you need to memorize for your own personal gain

1. I am 5'1 but my ideal height would be 5'3. To bad my doctor told me at 17 I was done growing, even though all other woman grow till there 21, typically.

2. I had a cactus themed party for my 3rd birthday. I recived a cactus for my birthday and named it "Skoogie." He grew about 9 inches tall and grew an arm/ nub and had a grayish hair like fuzz on the top of him. I keep Skoogie till I was 13, were in which I acidentaly knocked him into the hamper with my towel and snapped my loving cactus in half. I stood over him and wept till my mom came in and saw the tragic demise of our beloved and loyal, desert dewler.

3.Fall and Spring are the only seasons I like. I have no interest in the extreams of weather. I like color and mild climate.

4. I cut hair, and yes I am licened in the state of California. I specailize in mens hair cuts, and stylist work. Oddly enough I have never colored my own hair, I go for the au natrual, even though I don't paticulary enjoy the natural haircolor I have been blessed with. I think its working for me.

5.When I was 16 we went around deciding future occupations for everyone. Some one was a pilot, some one was the face of Brawny Paper Towels, one was a soft core adult film maker... quite an eclectic crew. When the focus had turned towards me, it went silent. we couldn't think of any job suitable for me. It was determined by the "brawny man" that I would be and adorable pregnant woman. I would need to be with child the rest of my life. That was the only position worth my time. We'll see what comes of that.

6.EDIT BY AUTHOR.#6 HAS BEEN REVOKED DUE TO CONTENT.THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING

7.I have never been a picky eater, accept when I was 4 I went a whole year only eating triangle shaped food. ( I suspect I got it all out of my system.) I bought myself my first bike at the age of 7. I used my birthday money and found my noble steed at "Thrift Town" in sugar house, UT. It was sherbet colored and had rainbow clackers on the wheels. Senior year of high school, I wrote a 3 page long essay on my mechanical stallion, it still one of the favorite things I have ever wrote.

8.I have a secret Journal that has always been kept under lock and key.

9.I am not aloud to have "Koolaid Squeezits," especially in my younger years. One year I woke up on my birthday and found there was a four pack or the Outrageous Orange in the refrigerator with a bow on it. That birthday is in the top 5 catagory.

10.My children will only be aloud to watch Buggs Bunny and other Looney Toons programs before 1973. I find the political incorrectness, refreshing and will shape them into well rounded productive citizens. They can also watch Dexter's Labortory. The only show I have enjoyed in years, songs from this delightful program play through my head on a daily basist.

11.I thought long and hard one day, I would not buy a new car if I own the Lotto. Gigi has been good to me. I would get her a car wash though. I would buy the rights to my favorite movies, I would collect random pieces of art, first edition books, edicate and tact, historical memorabilia, traveling destinations, happiness, and have a house in Bath, Geneva, New York, outskirts of Hong Kong and San Clemente.

12.I can picture exactly how I want my life to be. The only problem is, I cant figure out how to get the picture out of my head.

13.I don't care about much, I rarely worry about anything.

14.I think the type of shoes you wear screams volumes about the person you are. I have an interesting feddish with 50's Pin-ups, Evlgren is my favorite artist. I love lingerie and I own quite a few pieces, They are tastefull and fabulous. None of that polyester junk, I mean I own some swanky items. They are to amazing to say "no" to, I own them for my own plesure. No one elses.

15. As I am getting older im figuring out how hystaricaly funny my mother is. I try to emulate my ma in every way. She has desiced when she retirers with my dad, that she will make my Father where a captains hat all the time, and she will wear " a jonty scarf around my neck, like the french or an airplane stewatist" and she will walk to teh grocery store with a wicker basket and have a little dog named eva. It was decided last night that mom and I are almost the same person, yet I'm a tid bit more indecent than she. You must meet her.

16. I get 10 to 12 hours of sleep a night, and I feel worthless about it, but at the same time oddly healthy.... plus my skin is doing great. Also most of my dreams come true about people I have never met before. I have deja vous on a regular basis.

17. My #2 favorite place in the world is Versailles.

18. I am Dyslexic. ( and no I get no specail perks like handycap parking, or a tax break) I took the specail star test in school were I had no time limit. I have an increiable compehenion and did fantastic on that part. i got an 32% on my spelling. I can not spell. I must think about my left from my right adn more often than not i will say left for anything. on occasion i switch the first letters of each word in a sentence so instead of saying "sick and needed" i said "nick adn seeded" and numbers adn time are the worest. in my head they are right, but i will say them backwards. i call it a quork and endiring.

19. I love to read, but not sapply love stories, I personaly hate them. The kinda day I try to have often is one where I get to read, drink Oraganina and just sit. I do try to have fresh flowers around as well. My favorite book so far I got for 50 cents at the friends of the libreay.

20. I really want to live in teh english country side and have a fantastic victorian farm house, and I would play the strokes, and the raido department, and the cranberries all day. I would have cake plates all over the house filled with tarts and sweets for when ever you would like. The house would be filled to the brim with increidtable flea market finds. There would be an on going puzzle we would work on in the kitchen, and only put a table cloth over it to eat. I could grow a phomominal garden of peonies, and berrys of differant assortments, and play with my kids all day and they could wear what ever they would like. If I found something in my bargin hunting that was under 20 dollars I would by it, wrap it, and give it to them as an "unbirthday presents."...that would be a devine existance.

21. I am a private person in matters that are important to me. You wouldn't guess because im open about some things and you would naturaly jsut suppect I would be will all my afairs. I pruposely am vage so to aviod drama, gossip, and noisey Nelda's. I get it from my father I think.

22. I love my father. we are closer than most people will notice, and I oddly see so much of my father in my self. I look more like him than mom and act I think more like him as well. He is the most honest loveing man I feel I have ever meet, but im probably being bias. As I get older I find more things about him (hes quite secretive) and I have come to realilize how fasinating this life has been. I also tear up when I think about him to much. Most time than not, I will put and extreamly casual spin on our realastionship just so I can aviod getting emiotional in the least.

23. I recantly stopped bitting my nails in july, since then I feel like i have developed a sever case of OCD. I now have over 50 nail files, through out my room, my house, my car, my purse, my work, and other's houses. i carry at least two nail polishes with my at all times, i currantly have 4 with me tho. If all my nails are not the same in every way it gets quite difficult to funtion. Ill think about it and stare at a chip, a scrath, and nick, if one nail is a differant lenght, if one isn't the same shape as the others, if its not straight. I must completly start over i will peel it all off right then to all nails and completly paint them again. this have only statred since july mind you. i even had to pull over on the free way once to do this bizzar ritual. this is the only thing i have an issue with, i have no other problems remotely close to this i cant explain it. some times i think i should have just kept biting them, but i do have a great set of nails now.

24. I laugh when I get nervous. I can't think of one instance where I have been embaressed. I strach my back with me thumbs when I get tired but this was pointed out by my best firend i had never noticed it before until she had mentioned it. My dad used to scratch my back to make me fall asleep till I was 8. back scratches are my favorite thing. im an ESFP

25. Most of everything I will say is a quote from some where. I get really impressed when you catch it when I do so.

26. My biggest fear is crying infront of people. Few of my closest friends have ever seen me cry. When I do let it happen, or am inable of preventing it, I get enraged.

27. Most of all of you are laughing at hte horrors of my grammer and at my spelling currently, and some will not be able to decipher some of the words i have tried to spell. I speak eleqently but it doesn't transfer to paper well.

28. I have an affinity for people of questionable natural and backgrounds. They are attracted to me, and I to them. Keeps things interesting.

29. I love documentarys. I know absuded amounts of random and useless facts that will get me no where in life by having them at my disposal. I just really enjoy them. For example, the origanal use for Kellogs Corn Flakes and Gramcrakers were to cure chronic masterabstion. There are 15,000 differant typs of rice. Chuck Noris's real name is Carlos Ray. All polar bears are left handed. And a fetus develops fingerprints at eighteen weeks. Your welcome.

30. "To know, and to love another human being is the root of all wisdom." Evelyn Waugh. Probably one of the more true things I have ever read. I can say I have loved some one, and I think that means eveything.

31. I have no sympathy, for people who play the victims of there lives. I some times feel bad admitting that but I don't. I am quite blunt with the ones I care for, if I'm not with you, I really don't enjoy you that much, thus not caring the outcome of your life. Cowboy up partna. "You might wanna down play that whole "partna" act." "Ya, like that hasn't crossed my mind."

32.I don't wear it on my sleeve but I do have a testimony for this gosple.It has shaped me to be the person I am, and im proud of it. If you love me you gotta love it too, we're a package deal.

33. I rarely get offended. I can't take anyone seriously for the one fact that in my head I litteraly see a neon electric sign, blinking floating about your head falshing, NOT WORTH IT, DERELICK, IGNORANT PRICK, or seomthing to that effect .... and then some mean, but true, critizisume about that person. I think it has saved my sanity.

34. When im alone I am in a constant daydream, so much so, I do talk to my self and have complet and lengthy conversations. My subconious is suprisinly morbid, and I don't tell people about it to avoid questioning eyes. Often I play "how would you servive this situation," it is some dire, life threating event is taking place. Some one tried to high jack a plane and I was the only person with enough spunk to do anything about it. My car just flipped into a lake and some moron can't figure out how to swim out and I must point out that you have to swim away from the car before the suction of the water entering the car would drowned you, or how I would stab a man in the eye with my finger if he ever tried to rape me. All of these mini movies, in which I am the heroin, have outrageously witty dialog. I am also shockingly vulgar and play up a suddel accent that I cant quite put my finger on where it orginates from. I am really prepare for anything from these metal excerises. All of those events happened yesturday went I had 2 hours or nothing at work. The car incodent, was driving on my way home.

35. I am most comfotable in jeans and a tee shirt, no shoes, my hair in a bun on top of my head, and no masquara. I perfure water to anything. I want to live a lavish, excentric, explored life. It will be simplistic and unnessesary at the same time. Understated and gaudy. That is the best way to explain where I see myself in years to come.

webcam tragedy

Comes to my attention that there are two tragedies that have happened.

First off lets start with the most recant. Happened about 45 seconds ago. I was going to *title this " Webcam Tragity." when it didn't seem to look right I tried "Webcam Tragicty." This to didn't feel correct (go figure). So being lazy and not wanting to work on sounding it out anymore I looked it up on *Google how to *spell it. Tragedy, by all means did not look right, I thought for certain that I was closer with Tragity. so then I *proceeded to look it up on dictionary.com, I was there for convinced that this was the true spelling of the word.

On to the show! Next tragic event that has taken place is that I have figured out I have a webcam. 1. I have have this *computer for over 6 months 2. I'm positive it will be added to the list of thing that consume my time 3. I had to take the "easy walk-through" course for the program twice. Here are the *gems from my discovery.


Proud that it worked and I can skip taking the "How to" course a *third time.

Trying, that's all I can say. It hurts me too. Did I mention this is the *maiden *voyage of my black, Kate Spade reading glasses.

Some could say, technology and me aren't on good terms.

*Costume change, notice the upside-down, baby blue Hello Kitty bow.

Ample viewing of *novelty bow which in fact is still upside-down. Idiot.

My dentist says I am a "*tongue thruster," thus *having to wear my retainer for the rest of my life. The cause is that my *tongue is just a wee to big for my mouth. I have to stop myself from doing this in all pictures.

And scene.

What else did I do to waste my time today, you could wonder. I organized my clippings, took a shower, made rice, wrote a letter, thought about cleaning and added pictures to the post 2 below this one.

FOOT NOTE- all the things with stars * next to them are things I spelled *incorrectly. This list is missing about ten to twelve other words but I'm not positive if those were contributed to my poor typing. I can read *proficiently though, just can't make the turn around.